When you’re zen, but still have an edge...
The Happy Zen as F#ck Mala Bracelet features luxury Laguna Lace Agate gemstones along with a tan wood bead engraved with the words 'zen as fuck' to help lighten your mood, stabilize your energy and gently infuse confidence, strength, courage, vitality, harmony and balance.
Laguna Lace Agate is a gorgeous Mexican gemstone with layers of scarlet reds, soft browns and yellows, silvery whites and smoky grays. It is renowned for its slow, stabilizing energies and powerful grounding vibration. The harmonious flow balances all chakras and infuses deep healing from within.
Agate is one of the oldest gemstones in recorded history, used in jewelry since Biblical Babylonian times. The internal crystalline structure is very stable, thus infusing the wearer with emotional, physical and intellectual stability. It centers and balances physical energy and brings about great strength. Psychologically, Agate inspires self acceptance and self-confidence. It enhances mental function and improves concentration, perception and analytical abilities, leading to practical solutions. Emotionally, this crystal overcomes negativity and bitterness of the heart. It heals inner anger, fostering love and the courage to start again. Is useful for any kind of emotional trauma. Spiritually, Agate raises personal consciousness and links into the collective consciousness, bringing an expanded awareness of the oneness of life. It encourages quiet contemplation and assimilation of life experiences, leading to spiritual growth and inner stability. The multiple layers of Agate can bring hidden information to light as it gently realigns mind, body and spirit. It resonates with all chakras to bring love, abundance, good luck, longevity, acceptance, courage, strength, protection, balance and vitality.
8mm and 6mm natural gemstones, hand-laced on strong elastic stretch cord. One size fits most wrists, 6.5” circumference. We are happy to accommodate special size requests. Feel free to leave us a note in the messages section at checkout. There is no extra charge for custom sizing.
Since all stones found in nature have unique fingerprints of their own, color tones, striations and patterns may vary slightly.
Crystal healing has been used for thousands of years, dating back to the Ancient Sumerians. Each variety of crystal has a unique internal structure which causes it to resonate at a certain frequency. It is this vibrational resonance that gives gems their healing abilities. Crystals and gemstones actually breath in and breath out energy. Each one interacts with the human biofield differently, and can magically move, absorb, focus, direct and diffuse energy within the body. This awakens cells that are vibrating on a lower frequency and brings them back into balance. A healer can then charge a crystal with the pattern of energy she chooses (like an electromagnetic current) to hold specific therapeutic vibrations. Brenda combines her strong energy with the ancient power of Reiki to magnify the natural healing properties of the gemstones. The result is a shift in the body’s energy system, enabling well-being to flow, and a powerful new point of attraction that can help you manifest your deepest desires.
Reiki is the ancient Japanese practice of balancing energy. When Reiki energy is infused into crystals, it magnifies the healing power. It actually 'charges' objects with protective, positive energy and increases the effectiveness of a crystal's natural healing vibration. Reiki infused jewelry can then be given as a gift to someone who needs a bit of a boost, or to yourself when you need an extra dose of healing.
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Official website: sacredhealthjewelry.com
*While crystals/vibrational therapies have been used historically to relieve symptoms, manifest desires and promote well-being, we of course cannot guarantee specific outcomes. They work by calibrating the energy field to a coherent frequency and are enhanced by intention. Individual results will vary.
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©2016 Sacred Health Jewelry
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Buyers are responsible for any customs and import taxes that may apply. I'm not responsible for delays due to customs.
Just contact me within: 7 days of delivery
Ship items back to me within: 14 days of delivery
Buyers are responsible for return shipping costs. If the item is not returned in its original condition, the buyer is responsible for any loss in value.
Please contact me if you have any problems with your order.
All of our designs, photos and written content are the exclusive personal property of Sacred Health. If you see our products and/or our photos being advertised online from other companies, they are plastic counterfeit copies, low grade replicas or phishing scams. These companies are being investigated for fraud.
Similarly, we are not affiliated with Sacred Health in Des Moines, IA. We currently hold the trademark for our name.
Authentic Sacred Health Jewelry is only available online at
sacredhealthjewelry.com and sacredhealthjewelry.etsy.com.
Crystal healing has been used for thousands of years. Each variety of crystal has a unique crystalline structure which causes it to resonate at a certain frequency. When held or worn against the body, each gem (depending on its internal structure) interacts with the human biofield differently and can magically move, absorb, focus, direct and diffuse energy within the body. An energy healer can then charge a crystal with the pattern of energy she chooses (like an electromagnetic current) to hold specific therapeutic vibrations. Brenda combines her strong energy with the ancient power of Reiki to magnify the natural healing properties of the gemstones. The result is a shift in the body’s energy system, enabling well-being to flow.
Reiki is the ancient Japanese practice of balancing energy. When Reiki energy is infused into crystals, it magnifies the healing power. It 'charges' objects with protective, positive energy and increases the effectiveness of a crystal's natural healing vibration. Reiki infused jewelry can then be given as a gift to someone who needs a bit of a boost, or to yourself when you need an extra dose of healing and self-love.
It is often said that malas choose you. The first one that catches your eye is usually the one you're meant to have. It's truly that simple. Allow yourself to be drawn to the piece that speaks to you. You can also type any word into the search bar to describe your intention (confidence, strength, abundance, wealth, love, etc.) to see what pops up in that category.
A mala is sacred and it usually represents something different to each person. It can be a piece that inspires you, a reminder of an intention, a meditation tool, or simply a beautiful addition to your wardrobe. Whatever it means to you, embrace it. Roll around in it. Allow your inner wisdom to guide you in your choice. You will almost always call forth exactly what you need.
Yes absolutely! It’s important to us that your bracelet fits comfortably around your wrist. When you place your order, kindly leave us a little note in the ‘messages’ section at checkout with your wrist size and we'll accommodate your request for no additional charge.
If your bracelet needs to be re-sized after you receive it, simply contact us with your request. We'll happily adjust it at our expense. All you pay is the shipping costs to and from your home. The U.S. shipping fee is currently $9.45 for USPS Priority Mail Shipping with tracking. Feel free to slip a check inside the package for $9.45 when you mail it back to us. International shipping will be determined per country. We’ll remake your bracelet and ship it back to you asap!
Sacred Health™ has set the standard for luxurious high grade healing mala beads, wrapped with love from the artist. As with all luxury items of any kind, our jewelry requires a little extra mindfulness and care. Here are a few tips on how to keep them looking and feeling new:
1. Roll the beads gently over your hand onto your wrist instead of stretching the bracelet apart to put it on. 2. Keep them away from water, including salt water. 3. Remove them before applying lotions or sprays. 4. Try wearing them on your non-dominant hand to prevent accidental snagging. 5. Hold each bracelet over a stream of sage smoke if you’ve just been through something stressful to clear heavy energy. 6. Take them off before bedtime.
It is extremely important to us that you love your malas and get years of enjoyment from them! Of course stretch bracelets are not indestructible. They love being handled gently like any precious piece of art. They are not fond of rigorous wear, excessive stretching, or being submerged in water. Sometimes a bracelet will literally burst open from all the energy the stones have absorbed. Like anything else, with continued use, there is always a possibility your mala may come apart or need restringing. SHJ offers a one-year warranty on all purchases. Any broken piece will be repaired (and missing beads replaced) at our expense. All you pay is shipping (to and from). Yay! Simply email email@example.com to initiate a repair.
Crystal healing/vibrational therapies are not to be considered as a substitute for medical care. While crystals have been used historically to relieve symptoms and manifest desires, we of course cannot guarantee specific results. Our website is not to be considered as medical advise, diagnosis or treatment. All customer conversations relating to the emotional, mental & physical healing properties of crystals are from our own personal knowledge and intuition, as well as our education and research. Individual results will vary. In no event shall SHJ be held liable for any indirect, consequential, incidental or punitive damages related to the content, errors or omissions of this site. Mala beads are not suitable for young children.
We are so sorry you haven’t received your package yet! We so wish we could control the whole shipping process, but unfortunately once we ship a package, it is out of our hands and in the hands of USPS. We would absolutely hand deliver it ourselves if we could.
USPS offers a tracking number on every order. It is found at the bottom of your shipping email confirmation, or via ‘Purchases and Reviews’ on your Etsy account. If for some reason USPS enters an update that is unclear, you can contact your local post office for more information. Unfortunately at this point, we know as much as you do. Returns are credited to your account, less shipping costs, if USPS forwards your package back to us.
Brenda is scheduling private energy therapy sessions / clairvoyant readings in Meridian, Idaho by appointment only. She does not offer phone services at this time. The current wait time 2+ years. To schedule a Shamanic Reiki energy therapy treatment and clairvoyant reading, please contact firstname.lastname@example.org for available dates/times.
**UPDATE 2021: Brenda has retired from her energy therapy practice to focus solely on Sacred Health Jewelry.
Jun 24, 2020
The most wonderful human is behind the creation of these outstandingly crafted products. Bent over backwards without breaking a sweat in getting a surprise to my wife ahead of schedule. Will be ordering a lot more of these wonderful bracelets for my wife and myself.
Nov 9, 2019
This is beautiful!! My mom who has Alzheimer’s loves it!! Thank you so much!!!
Jan 21, 2018
Will definitely be buying from again. Fast shipping and questions were answered quickly. I love my mala 🙏🏼 Thank you